Chapter 34: Thirty-Fourth Day as a Salted Fish
Qin Jiaojiao had a bad habit when cooking: she often forgot to taste the food to check the seasoning. The dishes she made for herself always tasted delicious to her, so she overlooked a very important issue—Zhou Shaoli’s palate was much lighter than hers.
Hearing Zhou Shaoli’s praise, Qin Jiaojiao’s tail practically curled up to the sky. With a triumphant grin, she trotted into the kitchen, grabbed a spoon, and handed it to him: “Chopsticks are inconvenient for this, use a spoon.”
Zhou Shaoli put down his chopsticks, took the spoon, and silently ate the egg fried rice without a word.
This was likely the saltiest food he had ever eaten, yet his movements were completely graceful, looking just like someone cutting into a steak at a fine French restaurant.
Sitting across from him, Qin Jiaojiao watched him eat the dinner she made, feeling an inexplicable sense of accomplishment. Her culinary skills weren’t inferior to those private chefs at home with six-figure annual salaries after all!
Under her cheerful, smiling gaze, Zhou Shaoli finished the entire serving of egg fried rice. After finishing, he tidied up the tableware, turned his back to Qin Jiaojiao, and silently downed two full glasses of water.
It was roughly nine in the evening. After heading upstairs to brush his teeth and wash up, Zhou Shaoli brought his laptop downstairs to catch up on work. Qin Jiaojiao sat beside him playing on her phone for a bit before deciding it would be much more comfortable to lie down in bed, so she went upstairs.
Zhou Shaoli had spent the morning driving Jiaojiao around for a spin and the afternoon taking the elderly man to the hospital. Having been busy all day, he hadn’t managed to get any work done. He sat in the living room processing tasks for over an hour until he heard strange noises coming from upstairs.
Shutting his laptop, he walked upstairs.
In the bedroom, Qin Jiaojiao was taking giant strides and performing calisthenics like an elementary school student.
A bewildered look crossed Zhou Shaoli’s handsome face. What on earth was she doing?
Qin Jiaojiao stomped back and forth in wide strides. Catching sight of him, she hopped right over to stand in front of him, a bright smile gracing her fair, delicate face. “Ah, you’re here! Quick, look! There are so many little sprites here!”
Zhou Shaoli: “?”
Following where Qin Jiaojiao pointed, he looked over, but there was absolutely nothing on the bed or window sill. Where were there any little sprites?
“Look, look! They can fly! What pretty little sprites!” Qin Jiaojiao’s eyes stared directly into the empty air.
Zhou Shaoli recalled that she had visited Shen Xiaoshan’s house tonight to eat some kind of wild mushroom beef hotpot. Could she have gotten poisoned?
The wild mushrooms in Nancheng were delicious, but many varieties were toxic and caused hallucinations when ingested. Mild poisoning could trigger psychiatric reactions, which matched her current state perfectly.
Domestically, the rate of mushroom poisoning each year was extremely high, and delayed emergency treatment could even lead to death.
Zhou Shaoli’s expression changed. Grabbing Qin Jiaojiao’s hand, he was just about to speak when she reached up to cover his mouth, lowering her voice: “Shh, don’t make a sound! You’ll scare the little sprites away!”
“Let’s dance with them too!” Qin Jiaojiao took his hand, her soft little hand tugging him as she swayed from side to side.
Zhou Shaoli had no choice but to go along with her movements while pondering how to get her downstairs and send her to the hospital for a checkup.
Qin Jiaojiao suddenly let out a loud cry. “Help! I’m falling into the ocean!”
She leaped onto Zhou Shaoli, wrapping her legs tightly around his waist and locking her arms around his neck, crying out in sheer terror: “Zhou Shaoli, quick, save me…”
Zhou Shaoli could only reach out to support her waist, saying: “It’s alright, don’t be scared. I’m right here.”
Qin Jiaojiao was genuinely terrified, her face pale with fright as she shouted: “Row the boat, fast! We need to reach the shore…”
Left with no choice, Zhou Shaoli went through the motions of rowing, reassuring her in a gentle tone: “We’ll be on shore in just a moment.”
Qin Jiaojiao buried her head in the crook of his neck, her soft black hair brushing against his clothes as her breath puffed over his exposed collarbone, sending a wave of numbness through him.
When they had first started living together, Qin Jiaojiao bundled herself up tightly in long-sleeved, long-pants pajamas. Over time, as she realized he posed no threat to her, she began wearing whatever felt most comfortable to sleep in.
Tonight, Qin Jiaojiao wore a light pink silk nightgown. The soft, form-fitting silk made it very easy to feel the warmth radiating beneath her clothes.
As Qin Jiaojiao pressed herself desperately against him, his breathing grew slightly uneven. Holding her in his arms, he opened the closet door, grabbed a suit jacket from behind her back to wrap around her body, picked up his phone, and dialed emergency services.
Since Qin Jiaojiao had eaten the mushroom hotpot alongside the rest of the show’s cast, the others had likely been poisoned as well. He explained the situation to the hospital staff, requesting that they dispatch several more ambulances.
After making a fuss for a while, Qin Jiaojiao finally quieted down. Looking down, he saw her little face was pale and beaded with sweat, looking terribly weak.
It would take a long time for the ambulances to arrive, and Zhou Shaoli couldn’t afford to wait. He dialed the phone number for the variety show’s person-in-charge. Fortunately, everyone stayed up late, so no one had turned in yet. Hearing about the poisoning, they were thoroughly shocked.
The production crew hurriedly sent people to check on Feizhu Cottage and the Shan-Meng couple’s house. Sure enough, the other two couples had also been poisoned and were experiencing hallucinations.
Carrying Qin Jiaojiao, Zhou Shaoli located the car provided by the production team, settled her into the passenger seat, pulled the seatbelt over to fasten her in, and quickly got into the driver’s seat to click his own belt.
As he fastened his seatbelt, his hand trembled ever so slightly.
Back in his youth, when a major project he led ran into a catastrophic issue and all his meticulous planning collapsed at the final stretch, he hadn’t felt this nervous or emotionally shaken.
Clasping the steering wheel with both hands, Zhou Shaoli stared straight ahead and took a deep breath to force himself to calm down.
Driving required a clear mind, and with Qin Jiaojiao sitting beside him needing medical treatment, he had to get to the hospital as fast as possible.
Zhou Shaoli started the engine, speeding out of the village at high speed and following the navigation toward the hospital.
Upon arriving at the hospital, Zhou Shaoli brought her straight into a ward. Sitting on a bench in the hospital corridor with fine sweat dripping from his forehead, he lowered his eyes, his mind a complete blank.
Ever since taking the helm at Zhuxing Group, everything had been within his control, and no unexpected accidents had ever slipped past him.
Never had there been a moment where he felt such an unknown, flustered panic as he did now.
Admitted for medical treatment, Qin Jiaojiao was diagnosed with mild poisoning, which wasn’t too severe. However, she remained fast asleep on the hospital bed while the nurse administered an IV drip.
Zhou Shaoli received a harsh scolding from the doctor: “Honestly, you young people! Every single year people end up poisoned from eating mushrooms—lying flat on the way in, lying flat on the way out! Why won’t any of you listen and just have to give in to your gluttony?”
For the first time in his life, Zhou Shaoli was scolded without daring to refute. He responded with total humility: “It’s my fault, Doctor. How is my wife doing?”
Seeing his good attitude, the doctor’s tone softened slightly: “It’s just mild poisoning. Keep her under observation in the hospital for a few days, and if everything is fine, she can be discharged.”
“Thank you, Doctor.” Zhou Shaoli left the office and hurried back to the ward.
Qin Jiaojiao was staying in a VIP hospital ward. When the nurse saw Zhou Shaoli enter, she offered a greeting and stepped outside.
Zhou Shaoli sat by the bedside, took a look at Qin Jiaojiao lying on the bed, went into the bathroom to wet a towel, and walked back to wipe the sweat off her forehead.
Qin Jiaojiao slept through the night, waking up as the early morning sun began to rise. The curtains hadn’t been drawn, allowing the early sunlight to stream into the clean ward, casting a warm, pale golden glow over the room.
Opening her eyes, Qin Jiaojiao stared blankly at the ceiling for quite a while before regaining full consciousness. Taking in her surroundings, she finally realized she was lying on a hospital bed.
She turned her head to the side and spotted Zhou Shaoli sitting on the sofa, propping up his head while sleeping.
Had he stayed by her side all night?
Zhou Shaoli sat profile-to-window, the morning sun coating him in a soft halo of light that accentuated his extraordinarily handsome features.
Only after her mind fully recovered did Qin Jiaojiao remember what had happened. Last night at the wooden house, she had suffered from hallucinations. First, she had been hyperactive, performing absurd actions while seeing a bunch of colorful little sprites dancing. Then, she had suddenly felt like she was surrounded by an ocean, crying out that she was about to drown, jumping onto Zhou Shaoli and insisting that he row a boat.
Oh god, what embarrassing things had she done?!
Four words flashed through Qin Jiaojiao’s mind: mushroom poisoning. She had heard that severe mushroom poisoning meant “lying flat on a board”1—was she about to die?
Qin Jiaojiao clutched the blanket tightly with both hands. She never should have gone to eat that stupid wild mushroom beef hotpot arranged by the production team! Thinking about how she hadn’t gotten divorced to collect her ten billion yuan, travel the world, and buy all kinds of expensive clothes and bags—dying of organ failure from mushroom poisoning just two months after transmigrating into a book—she felt filled with immense regret!
Drowning in grief, Qin Jiaojiao didn’t notice that Zhou Shaoli had woken up. Fixing his eyes on her, he stood up and walked over to the hospital bed.
“You’re awake,” the man’s pleasant, resonant voice drifted over.
Qin Jiaojiao looked up with teary eyes, gazing at him pitifully. “Am I about to die?”
“…”
Without waiting for him to reply, Qin Jiaojiao went ahead and made her own arrangements: “If I die, does that mean I won’t get the ten billion? After the business alliance is dissolved, could you please not withdraw your investments from the Qin family? My parents will definitely be heartbroken…”
Her words grew increasingly tragic: “I don’t like being buried underground. After I die, could you apply to the government to scatter my ashes into the sea… mmph.”
She stared with tear-filled eyes at Zhou Shaoli standing by the bed.
The man’s broad palm was covering her mouth, a faint flicker of heartache passing through his light brown eyes as his voice softened: “It’s only mild poisoning. You’re not going to die.”
He had stayed by her bedside through the entire night, only catching a brief nap right as the sky began to turn pale. Upon waking up, seeing her looking so heartbroken while spouting endless ominous nonsense had sent his heart thumping wildly.
“Not going to die?” Qin Jiaojiao’s dangling heart settled right back into place, her grief lifting in an instant, replaced by a sudden wave of embarrassment.
Zhou Shaoli looked at her with calm, steady eyes. “You won’t.”
Qin Jiaojiao felt uncomfortable talking while lying down, so she tried to turn around and sit up, accidentally tugging at the needle on the back of her hand. She let out a sharp hiss.
Zhou Shaoli leaned over to gently hold her hand. “Don’t move around.”
Qin Jiaojiao said: “I want to sit up for a bit.” Talking to Zhou Shaoli while lying down felt awkward.
Zhou Shaoli pressed the auto-adjust button beside the bed, causing the hospital bed to slowly tilt upward into an incline so she could lean back comfortably.
Recalling that she wasn’t the only one who had eaten the mushrooms last night, Qin Jiaojiao quickly asked about the others: “What about Teacher Jin and Shen Xiaoshan? Are they alright?”
Zhou Shaoli replied: “I notified the production crew to send the other guests to the hospital as well.”
Qin Jiaojiao breathed a sigh of relief. Who could have anticipated that a single meal of mushroom hotpot almost caused the entire cast of Romantic Lovers Season 2 to kick the bucket?
“Are you hungry?” Zhou Shaoli asked.
Qin Jiaojiao’s stomach was indeed feeling a bit empty, so she nodded.
Zhou Shaoli said: “I’ll go buy some food. If you need anything, press the call button beside you to get the nurse.”
“Okay,” Qin Jiaojiao replied obediently.
Once Zhou Shaoli left the ward, Qin Jiaojiao felt a bit bored, so she picked up the remote control and turned on the television.
Her VIP ward was spacious and bright, offering a wide, pleasant view out the window where birds were chirping merrily in the morning air.
There weren’t any interesting dramas on TV, so she switched over to the variety show channel. Season 2 of Romantic Lovers was prominently displayed on the homepage, featuring a massive promotional poster of all three guest couples.
So Episode 2 had already aired last night.
Qin Jiaojiao clicked into the show. The content of Episode 2 mainly picked up from the previous episode, where the guest couples received a task requiring them to use their household funds to earn money.
Season 2 of Romantic Lovers featured Shen Xiaoshan and Meng Zi’ang as the C-position, so they received significantly more screen time. Full of drive, Shen Xiaoshan and Meng Zi’ang had set off early in the morning to scout out the local market.
The two had first visited the market to check prices, then went off chatting and laughing toward the dock. The morning fishing boats returned loaded with fresh seafood; as long as one woke up early enough, they could purchase high-quality seafood at cheap prices and sell it for a profit along the market streets.
Qin Jiaojiao recalled how back when Meng Zi’ang was together with the original host, they had only frequented high-end restaurants or private clubs. Around her, Meng Zi’ang had always maintained a distant, cold demeanor, treating her with endless impatience.
Looking at it now, the destined female lead truly was different. Meng Zi’ang would joke with Shen Xiaoshan, teasing her with humor that made them look just like any ordinary young couple in love.
No wonder the original host had remained so resentful—how could a high-society heiress like her lose out to the daughter of a fish vendor?
Qin Jiaojiao skipped past Shen Xiaoshan and Meng Zi’ang’s segment. One-fifth into the episode, Jin Mingzhu and her husband hadn’t gone to sell seafood. Instead, they had headed to a wholesale market to stock up on seasonal fruits like coconuts and mangoes, setting up a street stall to sell them.
It was the veteran couple’s first time running a stall, and thanks to their outstanding elegance, they proved extremely popular, yielding a rich harvest by the end of the day.
Finally, the show aired the segment featuring her and Zhou Shaoli. Not only had they failed to earn any money, but they had also taken their household funds to stroll through the street market and buy street food.
The bullet comments on the screen were lively and entertaining.
【 As expected, this couple is a pair of slacking salted fish! 】
【 Hahahahaha I guessed it right too! The Yueli CP is truly built different, completely ignoring the production team’s script. 】
【 Qin Jiaojiao is killing me, while everyone else is working hard to earn money, she just righteously answers: “We lost twenty.” 】
【 Is this the CEO’s first time eating at a street stall? Seeing him look so worried yet having no choice but to eat the street snacks fed by his wife is so hilarious. 】
【 President Zhou’s eyes are completely full of his wife, so sweet! I’m shipping this so hard. 】
【 Does anyone else feel like this couple is way too lazy? They didn’t even do the task assigned by the crew, why did they even bother joining the show? 】
【 I have zero interest in watching such a lazy couple, the production team needs to cut down their screen time. 】
The comments were split half-and-half between fans swooning over the romance and critics throwing shade.
Soon, the footage transitioned to nighttime, where the production team announced that Shen Xiaoshan and Meng Zi’ang had taken first place, winning a luxury cruise one-day tour ticket.
Shen Xiaoshan and Meng Zi’ang put on a wild display of affection on the luxury cruise ship, which received a pretty solid response—though… it looked somewhat scripted.
Fast-forwarding the episode at triple speed, Qin Jiaojiao watched as Jin Mingzhu—who had given her surfing tickets to her earlier—headed to the seaside for night fishing alongside her husband, Chen Feihong, both fully gear-out in sun-protective clothing and carrying buckets.
Slowing the video down, Qin Jiaojiao was curious whether the two could actually catch any fish. Through the show, she had learned that Chen Feihong was a veteran fishing enthusiast who frequently went ocean fishing with friends.
However, during this sea fishing trip with his wife Jin Mingzhu, not a single fish bit his hook! Instead, his wife caught a fish and even reeled in some crabs—leaving him completely breakdown-level frustrated, which was honestly hilarious.
After the Feizhu CP’s segment ended, it was time for her and Zhou Shaoli.
Seeing her appear in a swimsuit, the bullet comments instantly exploded.
【 Ahhhhhh so gorgeous! My god, she’s as dazzling as the moon, absolutely stunning! 】
【 No wonder President Zhou loves his wife so much, he’s eating so well! 】
【 Haha President Zhou is jealous! Refusing to let the male coach instruct his wife, so he sticks close to teach her himself. 】
【 So sweet, so sweet, I’m dying from the fluff! 】
【 How does the Yueli Couple turn applying sunscreen into something that makes people blush and their hearts race?! 】
【 I can’t, this is too hot! Are there any fanfic writers creating content for this? I’m starving! 】
Reading the comments, Qin Jiaojiao felt her face grow warm. Modern netizens were truly bold and wild with their words behind the safety of a screen!
Just then, Zhou Shaoli returned.
Qin Jiaojiao hurriedly used the remote to turn off the TV, dropping her eyes and pretending as though nothing had happened.
Carrying two portions of breakfast, Zhou Shaoli set them down on the coffee table by the sofa. “The bathroom has toiletries. I can hold the IV pole for you—do you want to go wash up?”
Qin Jiaojiao: “Mm.”
Zhou Shaoli pulled back her blanket, reached out to take the IV pole, and the two walked into the bathroom one after the other.
The VIP bathroom was spacious and clean, fully stocked with toiletries like a luxury hotel.
Using her free hand, Qin Jiaojiao grabbed a toothbrush and bit open the packaging. Zhou Shaoli used his spare hand to squeeze toothpaste onto it, filled a glass with water, and brought it to her lips—all with complete, natural ease.
Qin Jiaojiao stole a glance at him, leaned down to take a sip, spat it out, and began brushing her teeth.
Feeling a bit self-conscious, she brushed very quickly. Zhou Shaoli lifted the glass back to her lips so she could rinse her mouth. Once she finished, he had her hold the IV pole herself.
Zhou Shaoli picked up a towel and dampened it with water. “Close your eyes.”
Subconsciously obeying, Qin Jiaojiao closed her eyes as the warm towel gently wiped across her face.
Zhou Shaoli moved with patient care, thoroughly wiping every corner of her face before gently murmuring, “All done.”
Qin Jiaojiao opened her eyes to look into the mirror. Seeing Zhou Shaoli standing right beside her reflection, a subtle ripple stirred in the depths of her heart.
Was he actually some kind of magical Snail Fairy2?
Taking the IV pole back from her, Zhou Shaoli held her arm to guide her back to the bed, raised the overbed table, and opened the takeout containers for her.
A light, fragrant vegetable and minced pork porridge wafted an appetizing aroma. Zhou Shaoli tested the temperature against the edge of the bowl. “It’s good to eat now.”
Qin Jiaojiao lowered her head, absently stirring the porridge with a spoon before taking a sip. The seasoning was perfectly balanced, and it tasted delicious.
Zhou Shaoli: “Not to your taste?”
“It’s good…” Without lifting her head, Qin Jiaojiao asked, “When can I be discharged?”
Zhou Shaoli replied, “The doctor said you need to stay under observation for two days.”
Taking another spoonful of porridge, Qin Jiaojiao said, “Since everyone got poisoned and hospitalized, what’s going to happen with the show’s recording?”
“The production team will handle the arrangements, you don’t need to worry.” Zhou Shaoli’s voice was calm and steady. “The most important thing for you right now is to recover.”
“Oh…” Qin Jiaojiao lowered her eyes, slowly stirring and sipping her porridge.
Zhou Shaoli ate quickly. Packing up the empty takeout boxes, he glanced at Qin Jiaojiao, who sat with her head lowered. “I’m going to step out to make a call.”
“Mm,” Qin Jiaojiao responded.
Zhou Shaoli was calling Han Xiao, briefly explaining Qin Jiaojiao’s mushroom poisoning and having Han Xiao adjust his company schedule for the near future so he could stay and care for her.
Inside the ward, after finishing half a bowl of porridge, Qin Jiaojiao felt the urge to use the restroom. She glanced toward the closed door of the room.
Zhou Shaoli probably wouldn’t be back so quickly, right?
Qin Jiaojiao scrambled up to unhook her IV bottle, preparing to head to the bathroom. The next second, the door was pushed open, and Zhou Shaoli’s tall, slender figure appeared in the doorway.
Translator’s note:
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